Articles & Essays Book Reviews Creative Writing
Consciousness, Literature and the Arts
Volume 18 Number 3, December 2017
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IT’S LIKE GRASPING AT THE WIND
Foreword
the end point
of freedom
of religion
sits precisely there
where
religion demands
to take over
democratic rule
we cannot have
a democratic
adventure
and protect
freedom
of religion
unless every religion
agrees
to hold back
from
foisting
on all
others
its particular
beefs
that kind
of insistence
undermines
freedom of religion
and it undermines
the process that
ideally
promotes
free, open
rational dialogue
in order to
produce
contingent conclusions
that for that moment
represent the will
of a majority
while protecting
the minority
that’s the hard
problem
of democracy
- easily
destroyed, yet
taken for granted
so, no,
you cannot
have your way
if you undermine
my way and don’t
want to play
at being equals
in public spaces
and vice versa
there’ll be trouble
we will hurt
each other’s
feelings
from time
to time
okay?
i
it’s like grasping at the wind
to hold it in a fist
or trying to pin a nametag to the space
between this thought and that
even as I say, I am grateful
and keep walking in that mind
I know not to whom
I give thanks, for I don’t know
if You are a you. I could be
fanciful, I suppose, and write
You
sous rature, very hip, but beside the point
where points don’t exist
You did say there would be
life and death
blessing and curse and
therefore ”choose life.” It is
for this I am grateful
having chosen life
with great ease I recount
the cursed walls I’ve run into
harder to keep track
of my blessings
I take too many of them
for granted, perhaps
I accept that I cannot
have life but in the shadow of death
still, I want to learn
to make fewer mistakes
ii
“we are all connected to God,”
she says on the phone
“you are too, I know you are
I can hear it in your voice
you have a great power in you,
called love, God’s love
it lives deep in a person and in some
it’s more … coming through”
she speaks with a striking Israeli
accent. I might have followed her
into the desert, no nourishment
but the sun and the glory of God
“I just don’t have time at present,”
I beg off, “I can fix it,” she says.
“that’s because you’re Israeli;
Israelis can fix anything.” Laughter from Israel.
“So much of the Bible gets lost,
did you know Adam comes from Adamah?
land or earth? You need to get into
these spiritual connections in Hebrew”
“I know. As soon as I have time I will
take the next level.” “I started praying
the Psalms when I was in the army
now I do it all the time, so
don’t wait too long”
the temptations of faith are strong
iii
it’s on the rise again. Someone down south
lifted a stone, darkness oozed out
drifted north, emboldening
those wearing masks of “values”
bomb calls to JCCs, headstones tossed about
Swastikas painted on synagogues
and blood dripping down
the walls in a mosque in Quebec
institutions beef up security, a good thing
but better to learn the lesson
of Martin Niemöller, anyone could be next
a doctor helping a woman in need, a boy
inspired by a pope’s encyclical
to defend the rainforest
so when darkness falls upon you
we must be there with you, when it descends
on us, you will stand up, for ultimately
what is abhorrent to all of us building
this northern home
(with a huge mortgage still owed
to the indigenous peoples along with depths of gratitude),
is allowing the enemies of free will to tunnel in like termites
it is incumbent on us to help zealots who think
they hear some voice in holy books telling them
control or destroy your neighbour, to understand
that they didn’t listen deeply, because the only certainty
is that we’ve been tasked to be kind and to flourish
the rest is commentary
iv
“Hear, O Israel!
Adonai is our God, Adonai is One”
“To Me, O Israelites you are
just like the Ethiopians
true I brought Israel up
from the land of Egypt,
but also the Philistines from Caphtor
and the Arameans from Kir.”
so, a special message given to no one
special, perhaps, but one to be shared
with the nations, because if God
is One, there is nothing for us to do
but care for one another (which is hard) and for
those whom we consider strangers (harder still)
we must continue conversations
among our own about best practices
and meet those other nations and compare
notes, debate, be ourselves and be with them
sometimes the Dalai Lama becomes
the rabbi whose laughter I need
sometimes I’ll need the Hindu lady
who teaches by hugging
or I happen to run into a Christian who
tells me that the Kingdom of God is within
these rendezvous I bring back to Torah
and re-read now maybe closer to its wisdom
v
then doubt sets in
the force of a different wind
I understand those Israelites
at the foot of Mt. Sinai or Horeb
waiting, waiting under the clouds
the attention span of faith can be short
something happened on that mountain
with different names depending on your approach
a mirage, some hocus-pocus, a meme erupted
so mindboggling it felt volcanic (it rumbles still)
whether 3200 years or so ago, or 6 or 800 less
when the story was recorded, doesn’t matter
the message, the meme, to love the neighbour
the stranger, the widow, the orphan, the poor
whooshed in or down and it changed the arrow of history
perhaps that’s what makes us say it came from God
because the mystery of this idea is so great, so right
so out of line with its time - and our own still?
I believe in this mystery, doubt has blown away most
of the other stuff, though it peeks through now and again
and attempting to live in that mystery is harder
than climbing a mountain in a whirlwind
vi
so what’s it all about?
about an inner life
built on stories
of a people
surviving, at times
flourishing against all odds
a people miraculously
still here, contributing
about grandchildren
asking questions on Pesach
parents shining
in reflected light
about children
growing up inspired
by their ancestors
to continue against the grain
to say no to people
who want to conform them
getting to know
the heroes of the caves
and those from
the Polish woods
about not getting
stuck in narrowness
forever struggling with
the texts and the life
to mature like Jacob
into Israel
vii
the spiritual order
demands a life
beyond the individual
not an unthinking
life, not a regimented one
but a life with others
not all new as they say
about TV episodes
but inspired by
and engaging
with those who came
before us
their thoughts
tolerant of what they
could have meant
in their time
and why they could have
meant it and what
that might mean now
if anything useful
at all
given that most things
change
and only our need
for others remains
constant, but different
the current spiritual order
demands that we move
ahead, experiment
come together
in new formations
that we burrow ever
deeper in to our
various traditions
teach each other
but never forget
where we came from
so we can get better
at living together
without becoming
shallower
viii
whenever I report that, yes
I believe in God
I am often met
by a fixed quizzical mask
I break it by stating
probably not the one
you’re thinking about
right now, I don’t know
who he is
if questioned further
I might say
I believe in the Ayn Sof
the never ending
that which puts me in
a state of awe
is the sense of
eternity
that things can be seen
under its aspect
lending meaning
to the small
the smallness that I am
that we are
against the wholeness
that never ends
Heschel says that awe
is prior to faith
and I admit
my awe is greater
than my faith
ix
faith tempts
the belief
that we, my group’s
got it right
that you, the rest of you
are verkakte
delusional. Wars have begun
that way
faith’s temptation
is “finding” succor
against the uncertainties
that are our lot
our unchangeable lot
because life changes
we change with it
that’s unchangeable
no unalterable belief
will protect us
it could destroy
lives
x
and finally I pray
for sundogs
howling above
frozen prairie
for elm trees
signaling our reach
for the men
of violence
to deliver themselves
in dark alleys
for Your rain to moisten
souls sucked dry
for the voices of the enchanters
to drown
and for our children to grow
strong in Your tender shade
Afterword
Bang!
Bereshit bara Elohim et hashamayim
ve'et ha'arets
and it is good